The Principle of "YES...AND..."

[JDOG]

The Principle of "YES...AND..."


This I got from an Improv class I took a while back and recently realized that I had already adapted it, internalized it and was using it in pick-up.

When you’re doing improve with someone, they give you what’s called an “offer.”

Example:

“Is that a head in your freezer?”

Now there’s 3 categories of responses to this question.

1. Wrong: No.  No, it’s a chicken.
2. Bad: Yes, But.  Yes, but it’s just a fish head.
3. Best: Yes, And.  Yes, and there’s 2 more in the cupboard.

In the attraction phase of a pick-up, your frame should always be ‘Yes, and.’  As I edit this, I see this is most germane to the topic of tests.  Never disagree and never argue.  Also, neurolinguistically whenever you say “Yes, XXX, but YYY,” you effectively negate XXX which is just like saying no.

Examples:

Her: That’s a bad haircut
You: I know, and I told my barber you can give me a worse haircut than that, you’re not even trying!

Her: Are you an asshole?
You: Yeah, and I’ve been working on becoming a whole entire ass!

Her: Are you just trying to get laid?
You: Yeah, and I think if I saved up and bought those New Rock boots I’ve had my eye on I’m sure I could make it happen.

Her: Is that shirt from K-Mart?
You: Yeah, and it was like 80% off!

This shows a girl you’re unshakeable.  That’s a way of generating attraction.  It’s a way of showing that your frame is that you’re happy and having fun and no one can shake that.

Game on-

- Wilder

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Master the Curve

[Sky]

I've also learned this "Yes, and" concept when I took an Improv class, and it works wonders for anyone trying to be interesting and spontaneous. Theres an addition to the Improv related pickup skills I've learned. Here's also this improv game called the "Questions" game.  The rules were simple, ask a question and your opponent must answer with another question.

Example:
Her: Why do you wear a ring on that finger?
Me: Why else?
Her: Are you married or something?
Me: You are interested aren't you? aha

I've seen girls use this subconsciously to show wittiness and it's just awesome to watch. Even better participating.

The similarity between the games, is that your wits play a subconscious role in attracting her. They keep her interested in what you have to say, and it shows you have an open mind. It's different from the norm and is unexpected in a funny way and whenever I use this I get IOIs as a result.  Women are very used to the normal boring answers to their questions but if you twist it up a bit it adds a new element to the conversation, this not only keeps the conversation going, it breaks the Q and A cycle. When you are in the Q and A cycle, every reply you give has been anticipated and guessed before it even comes out of your mouth. They are "prepared" for answers, when you don't give it to them clearly, they are hooked.

[PhoenixPUA]

Haha. I love it. Basically it's the stealing frame concept. They make a leading statement that is obviously true, but instead of fighting it, you go with it and flip it and turn it into something HUGE!!!!

[thricerx7]

noted!

i like this.

[Bebop]

I've been doing this forever just subconsiously I guess.  This is sickk.   Its so true, you could use this to cop out of shit tests and flip it around.  For example, I have a Sidekick that's pink and blue.  Girls (and guys) ask me why I have those colors on my phone, and I just usually reply "Why not?"

Perfect.

[Sky]

Theres another addition to this I might add. I like to call it the "Really? No" concept. Basically, a girl asks why you have something like "Why do you have that scar?" and you basically answer with a completely made up yet interesting story that seems plausible, "I was jogging this morning and was attacked by the most ferocious, muscular, sharp toothed, mean looking chihuahua in the world!"  it has to be outrageous enough to make her say "Wow Really?" and here you can go 1 out of 2 directions, if you're out ideas to continue the improve just say "No, but that would have been cool" or if you can lead her astray for a few more lines and then pull her out of that frame by saying "No not really", if you tricked her into believing you in the first place, then tell her the truth, she'll probably playfully punch you in the arm because you got her gullible and going along with what you say.

[Indigenous]

These sound especially great to let shit tests just bounce harmlessly off of you...